OH GOD I didn’t post the right link on this account ha wow
SO YES I’m back hi hello I’ve missed you all very, very much.
I’m back under juststarkidding, so you guys can go follow me over there if you want :)
About a month ago, I decided that I needed to make a change in my life. So I stopped adding posts to my queue and let it run itself out. It gave me twenty days to come to terms with this, to accept that tumblr is no longer going to be a part of my life. When I wrote this letter, I had three days left with you. And now, posting it, I have none.
This blog began in December of 2009, at the request of my best friend. At first, I didn’t feel very drawn to tumblr, but then I began to join some fandoms, get into some books and tv shows. Since then, I’ve joined numerous fandoms and abandoned a few as well. I’ve met new people and met new friends and transitioned to different parts of my life. Both I myself and my writing have grown and matured.
But now, I’m on the cusp of the summer before my junior year of high school. I’m going to be taking on more responsibilities than ever before, and I can’t afford to waste my life away online instead of fulfilling them. I need to learn to be on my own. For over three years, I used tumblr as a distraction, an escape. An enabler for procrastination. I can’t do that anymore. I need to train myself to deal with life as it comes and keep my head high, not run home to my blog and cry and whine about it. I’m afraid I can’t do that if I stay.
Please know that this is nobody’s fault. There have been no anonymous hate messages in my askbox. I have not been bullied, exploited, or blackmailed into this. I’m doing this for me, for my well-being.
Letting you go is no easy feat. Saying goodbye to fandom, to those beautiful CrissColfer riots which were so good though few and far between, to spamming my lovely followers with pictures of decadent food, to using my blog as a shrine to Blaine Anderson and Darren Criss, to screaming and crying during an episode of Glee with the rest of the fandom on tumblr, to the unexpected wave of feels when I find a gifset of Harry Potter. I’m going to leave this behind, and more. It’s painful and sad, but I need to do it. I had to, at some point. But I’m doing this now before I regret staying. You should be proud of me. (I was always proud of you, too.)
I couldn’t leave without a goodbye. This blog was a good home to me. My followers are and were all good people. You are all lovely, every one of you. I’m sorry to be leaving. But for everything I’ve said and stood for for the past three years, I’ll be damned if I don’t leave you all with a few last notes, a few last requests:
My darlings, it’s time for me to go. I’d be delighted to keep in contact with my friends here. You know who you are: you are invaluable to me, and I would be delighted to stay in your lives. Feel free to stop into my askbox and perhaps we can exchange contact information.
If I ever decide to remake, I’m sure you’ll find me. I’m sure an announcement will be made by someone somewhere.
This blog stays. It will be an archive, the only accurate documentation of how I spent my time during the past three years. Feel free to unfollow it; you won’t be insulting me. It’s okay. I understand.
If I don’t find you again, know that I wished the best for you. I hope you all lead and live happy lives, with beautiful old books and music that makes you cry happy tears and friends that make you laugh when you’re sad.
I love you all.
I’ll miss you.
Meant to be a few hundred words on a potential context for ‘Come What May’. Turned into 2000 words of actual story. Has spoilers. Has Adam. Klainer friendly.
Adam picks the movie while Kurt pays the Chinese food delivery man at the door and then finds cutlery and plates for them to use. When he comes back and the title menu for Moulin Rouge is on the television screen he bites his lip but doesn’t say no. It’s Adam’s turn and explaining why this movie makes his heart ache isn’t something he’s ready to do.
An hour in, Satine and Christian are singing that stupid, heart-breaking song, and Kurt is almost choking on held down sobs, eyes glassy with tears and refusing to blink them free. In his head he tries to focus on reciting through the last decade’s worth of Vogue covers. Adam turns to him and smiles, it’s not unkind, not judging at all, just a lopsided smile that twists like vines around Kurt’s heart because it looks like affection. He pretends it hurts because Satine is dying and Christian can’t save her.
“I’ll be bawling by the end as well,” Adam reveals and then turns back to the film.
I give this kid an A++
these college emails i’ve been getting have started to sound more and more serial killer-ish.
EcoSphere: Inside these sealed glass balls live shrimp, algae, and bacteria, all swimming around in filtered seawater. Put it somewhere with some light, and this little ecosystem will chug along happily for years, no feeding or cleaning necessary, totally oblivious to the fact that the rest of the world exists outside.
WOW, now I really want a boyfriend… o-o But I guess I could do some of those with just friends too? I really want to try the invisible man one…